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Smart Car
by Doug Hawley

29: Happy Horrible Halloween

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While the cars and people were out in the yard on 30 October 2090, Duke said “This is a great day before Halloween, you might say ‘All Hallows Eve Eve”. 
 
Sheila responded “You might, but please don’t do it again.” 
 
Only slightly deflated Duke asked “What’s happening for the big day tomorrow?” 
 
Deuce spoke up for the cars “It’ll be great.  There’s a big parade of scary mid to late twentieth century cars.  Others are masquerading as ugly cars from the era, but I can go as myself, a 1969 Dodge Charger.  There will also be some replicars from then thanks to our billionaire friend Eugene Springfield.” 
 
Sheila’s other car Josie said “I’m going as a 1959 Cadillac using CGI and prosthetic four feet high tailfins popular at the time.  We first thought of going as a twin Ford and Mercury from when Ford was phasing out Mercurys and just copying Fords.  Carl will be an American Motors Pacer from 1975.  He thought of the Pontiac Aztec or the American Motors Gremlin, but they weren’t quite ugly enough.  Rather than go to a lot of trouble, he’ll just use a cloaking program.” 
 
Sheila asked her cars “Will there just be American cars?” 
 
Deuce said “There will be a few Europeans, but not many because we had a European car parade last year.  How about the Czech Tatra 603, Reliant Robin three wheeler, Messerschmitt KR200 and several Volkswagens?  They will be in the parade again this year.  Must be seen to be believed.  Some car collectors are as weird as their cars.” 
 
Duke averred “That sounds ten times better than the human parade.  You can bet that Sheila and I will be there.” 
 
The parade started at 2 PM and lasted until 4 so people and cars could get back to tricking and treating.  For the cars Carl and Josie, the shameless sex addicts, it would be trysting the night away in a secluded location performing their version of tryst and shout. 
 
The cars put on a dynamite laser show and a two hour medley of “The Monster Mash” and other Halloween songs.  Both humans and cars loved the performance. 
 
At the end Sheila commented to Duke “I’m glad that this is one holiday that hasn’t changed much.” 
 
“Amen my love.  Now if you have some treats for me, I know some tricks for you.  The treats better not have calories because I need to lose four or five kilograms.” 

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