by Doug Hawley
29: Happy Horrible
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While the cars and people
were out in the yard on 30 October 2090, Duke
said This is a great day before Halloween,
you might say All Hallows Eve Eve.
Sheila responded You might, but please dont
do it again.
Only slightly deflated Duke asked Whats
happening for the big day tomorrow?
Deuce spoke up for the cars Itll be
great. Theres a big parade of
scary mid to late twentieth century cars. Others
are masquerading as ugly cars from the era, but I
can go as myself, a 1969 Dodge Charger. There
will also be some replicars from then thanks to
our billionaire friend Eugene Springfield.
Sheilas other car Josie said Im
going as a 1959 Cadillac using CGI and prosthetic
four feet high tailfins popular at the time. We
first thought of going as a twin Ford and Mercury
from when Ford was phasing out Mercurys and just
copying Fords. Carl will be an
American Motors Pacer from 1975. He
thought of the Pontiac Aztec or the American
Motors Gremlin, but they werent quite ugly
enough. Rather than go to a lot of
trouble, hell just use a cloaking program.
Sheila asked her cars Will there just be
Deuce said There will be a few Europeans,
but not many because we had a European car parade
last year. How about the Czech Tatra
603, Reliant Robin three wheeler, Messerschmitt
KR200 and several Volkswagens? They
will be in the parade again this year. Must
be seen to be believed. Some car
collectors are as weird as their cars.
Duke averred That sounds ten times better
than the human parade. You can bet
that Sheila and I will be there.
The parade started at 2 PM and lasted until 4 so
people and cars could get back to tricking and
treating. For the cars Carl and Josie,
the shameless sex addicts, it would be trysting
the night away in a secluded location performing
their version of tryst and shout.
The cars put on a dynamite laser show and a two
hour medley of The Monster Mash and
other Halloween songs. Both humans and
cars loved the performance.
At the end Sheila commented to Duke Im
glad that this is one holiday that hasnt
Amen my love. Now if you have
some treats for me, I know some tricks for you. The
treats better not have calories because I need to
lose four or five kilograms.
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