Tell You What I'm
Gonna Do
by Michael A. Kechula
“Hey, Kid,
give it a try. Ten chances for a dollar. Toss a
ping-pong ball in the basket. If it stays in, you
win the best prizes on the Midway.”
“But your shelves
are empty. Where are the prizes?”
“In your
head.”
“Whadda
ya mean?”
“If you
win, you get whatever you want. Name it, and
you got it. But you gotta tell me within one
second after the ball settles in the basket. If you
take longer, you lose.”
“I bet if
I win and say Mustang convertible, you’ll
give me a little toy car.”
“No way.
See all those trailers parked over there?
They’re loaded with prizes. New cars.
Designer clothes. Gold jewelry. Anything a
teenager like you could ever want. You name it, I
got it.”
“You’re
kidding.”
“Nope. See
that gal in the tight red jeans at the hot dog
stand? She won a solid-gold watch a few minutes
ago. Ask her to show it to you.”
“Excuse
me, Lady. The guy over there said you won a
gold watch from him. Is that true?”
“Yep.
Look at this beauty. I’ll bet it’s
worth ten thousand bucks. I won it on my eighth
try.”
“Wow!
I’m gonna go back there and see if I can win
a car.”
“Good
luck,” she said.
“I see
you’re back. How many balls do you want?”
“Ten.”
“Here you
go. Good luck.”
“Hey! I
won!”
“Forfeit,”
he said. “You didn’t name your prize
within a second.”
“Aw hell. Well,
watch closely, because I’m gonna win again.
Yahoo. BUBBLE GUM!”
“We got a
winaaaa! Here’s a piece of bubble gum, Kid.
Chew it in good health.”
“Wait.
Something weird just happened. I was gonna say
Mustang convertible, but somehow I ended up
saying bubble gum. That sure as hell ain’t
gonna happen again. Gimme ten more balls.”
“Here you
go. Good luck. Hey, don’t lean over the
counter like that. It’s against the rules.”
“Sorry.
Okay…watch this. PLASTIC COMB!
“We got a
winaaaa! You’re a very lucky kid.
Here’s a nice comb for your curly hair.”
“Dammit!
It happened again. I don’t know why I said
plastic comb instead of Mustang convertible.”
“You must
be over excited. Tell you what I’m gonna do.
Next time you win, I’ll name the prize
for you.”
“Really?”
“I swear.
What color convertible do you want?
“Candy
apple red.”
“Okay,
Kid. Win again, and I'll name it for you.”
“Damn. I
can’t seem to get any balls in the basket.”
“Maybe
you’ll get lucky with the next one.”
“Hey! I
won!”
“Your
immortal soul,” he said
“What?
You were supposta say Mustang convertible.”
“Sorry.
My mistake. Tell you what I’m gonna do.
Whadda ya say we make a trade. I’ll
give you a Mustang convertible right now for your
immortal soul.”
“What's
that?”
“Nothing
compared to a beautiful new car. Think of all the
hot chicks you’ll be able to pickup. Is it a
deal?”
“Hell
yeah.”
“We got
another winaaaa!”
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