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Missed Appointment
by Michael A. Kechula

“How dare you stand me up!” Marcia yelled, while swinging a rolling pin at Harry’s head. “I waited hours for you to show up. Get outta here. I never want to see your ugly face again!”

“Don’t hit me. It’s not my fault. I got kidnapped by huge monsters.”

“Lying bastard!” She swung again.

“I swear on my mother’s grave. Gigantic locusts were hiding in the bushes right outside Clancy’s Pub. They grabbed me when I walked by.”

“Bull! So tell me, Jerk-o, how’d you manage to escape?”

“I promised them a bunch of Bugs-R-Us gift certificates...and you.”


Suddenly, giant tentacles tore the roof off. They reached inside and grabbed the gift certificates and Marcia.

Seconds later, Harry heard horrible screams, followed by a monstrous burp.

“Thanks, guys,” he hollered. “Next time you’re at Clancy’s, drinks are on me.”