Five Flash
Fiction Pieces
by Janine Bouyssounouse
Out Of Town Observations:
"Mmmm...
This stuff is good. What do they call it again?"
Hip asked Jod.
"I think
they call it roasted peanuts. They have those
long things in some type of wheat based product.
I think they call those hot dogs." said Jod.
"I wonder
if the dogs mind being eaten." said Hip.
"I think
they are not the same as the furry beasts that
seem to run this place." said Jod.
"Now why
do the furry beasts exercise their men by having
them hit the sphere and run around the square?"
asked Hip.
Jod replied,
"I think it is so they can keep track of
them during their time outside. Notice the
fencing to keep them contained. The furry beasts
have their hands full training their men with
this practice they call catch."
"I guess
the furry beasts have a long way to go training
these men before we are ready to take them to the
home planet, Bazor. Let's check back in another
hundred earth turns to see their progress."
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Look. What's That Up In The
Sky?
"Oh no!"
"What is
it, Jerry?"
"Look.
Can't you see it, Larry?"
"See what?
Are you on something?"
"It's
right there in front of you."
"All I
see is the tree swaying in the wind, Jerry. What's
the big deal?"
Kaboom!!!! The
tree house fell twenty feet and crashed into
hundred's of pieces.
"I tried
to warn you, Larry. I didn't want it to be an
unexpected windfall." Said Jerry to his
recently crushed friend.
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The Radio Announcer In Full
Sling:
Like a snipper,
he lay waiting. When the front door opened, he
pulled the trigger on the high powered sling shot.
The scissors
flew threw the air and pinned the intruder to the
door jamb by catching the edge of his jacket with
the scissor tips stuck in the wood.
Will the
snipper ever snip again?
Will the
intruder break free from the high powered scissor
pinning?
Stay tuned as
our combatants duke it out on prime time TV.
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Poor Old Tony:
"You can
bet your boots we're gonna miss him. He was a
real good time Charlie." Reg said to the bar
full of people.
"Lift
your glasses to Tony. May he rest in peace, since
his life was war." Reg lifted his mug in
tribute.
"Tony's
not dead, you old fool!" shouted the bar
maid.
"But he
didn't show up for drinks, so he must be dead."
said Reg.
"Don't
you read the papers? He won the lottery and took
off to Jamaica." Reg dropped his mug of beer
as he heard her voice. Tony was his best friend
and he didn't even tell him.
The following
week Reg read a postcard. "Don't think I
forgot you, you old fool. I always said I would
send you a post card if I ever struck it rich. It's
boring without you. Your ticket to join me will
be there in a few days. From your old pal, Tony.
P.S. Don't tell the bar maid I invited you
instead of her."
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The Leak:
"There’s
a leak in the roof, Bert." Mathilda stood
with her hands on her hips.
"Put a
pot under it. It’s not a big deal."
Bert turned the page in the newspaper.
"The
snow’s meltin’ and the roof’s
leakin’." Mathilda grabbed a pot and
put it on top of the towels sopping up the mess.
"I heard
you the first time, dear." Bert folded his
paper and went outside for a walk.
After his walk,
Bert came in the kitchen door only to find the
kitchen filled with snow and ice. He noticed a
corner of his wife’s apron sticking out of
the wet slush.
"I guess
she wasn’t foolin’ around about the
leak in the roof."
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