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Another Five Flash Fiction Stories
by Janine Bouyssounouse

What A Bother:

"Shall we uncouple, my dear?" said Harold with his nose in the newspaper.

"Why would you ever mention such an ugly proposition?" said Eunice.

"I have known every parlor maid we have ever had. I was thinking it might be a burden to you for others to know of it." answered Harold.

"But dear, I thought we had the perfect arrangement. I have known every stable boy and butler we have ever employed. I rather thought you preferred it this way." said Eunice.

Harold turned the page of the newspaper and replied, "Perhaps you are right, my dear. You always know best."


How Dare You?

"Is that a threat? How dare you threaten me?" Jack said to Jill.

"I was just saying. I won't have time for you if I have to do it myself." said Jill.

"You will have time for me because I will do it. It's my job." Jack said.

An hour or so later, Jack came back from doing his job.

"Are you done?" asked Jill.

"Here is your pail of water from up the hill. Now can we get busy in the bedroom?" said Jack.

"I just wanted you all hot and sweaty dear. I like you better that way." said Jill as she dragged Jack into the bedroom.


Make Up:

"That's it. I can't take it anymore. I'm leaving!" Joe said.

"These are tears of joy, so don't bother coming back." Mary said.

"You can count on it. I'm taking the cat, too." said Joe.

"You can have all of the snacks you want. I'm sure the trip back to the home planet will leave you hungry." said Mary.

"The high command knows you're staying for love of a human." Joe said.

"Let them know their plan succeeded. I've been assimilated and you have failed." Mary said.

Joe put the cat down and pondered.

"Can we do that thing they call make up sex and forget this silly conversation?" said Joe.


A Meeting Please:

"Mr. Rant, could we have a meeting?" Mr. Jones said.

"The secretaries run things around here. If my gal says yes, then it's a go." said Mr. Rant.

"I know what you mean. My gal makes all the decisions about who I see." said Mr. Jones.

"Hey, Jones, do you ever wonder why we bother to show up?" said Mr. Rant.

"My gal says I have to show up. Or it would look like she was running things." said Mr. Jones.

Back in the office… "Those guys would be nowhere if it weren't for us. Do you think they will ever figure it out?" said gal 1 to gal 2.


The Joy Ride:

"Look! Call 911! That car just hit the tree," yelled Steve.

Steve saw a glow of light from inside the car.

"Greetings, Steve," said the glowing light as it floated out of the car.

"What's going on? How do you know my name?" said Steve.

"Shhh… don't tell anyone you saw me. My dad doesn't want to know about another joy ride gone bad. I'll be in touch." said the glowing light as it floated into the atmosphere.

Steve stood in shock as the emergency response crew arrived. He was questioned, but had no information on where the driver of the car was. The other three people in the car were all dead.

A few days later… "Hey, Steve! Do you want to go for a joy ride? I'll find the car," said the glowing ball of light.

Steve politely declined.