The Bare Facts
by Tom Schmidt
It was just
supposed to be a cute little joke. Really,
that was all it was. But at times, a joke can go
It was a cool
fall evening in Western New York when Josh, Pat
and Casey decided to drive over to the house of
Rachel Vessing. Their intent was simply to
have a little bit of fun with their classmate on
her 17th birthday. The planned mooning
of the attractive redhead while singing happy
birthday was intended to humor. They were
sure that Rachel wont be offended by it and
would take the gesture in the manner intended.
Hey, it was
just a joke, right? But unbeknownst to the
boys, Rachels father, the Reverend Josiah
Vessing, was at home that evening and not at his
normal Wednesday night bible study.
was protective of his only daughter and became
even more so following the recent death of his
wife. So it was normal behavior for him to answer
the door with his daughter when the knock came at
roughly 9 PM that evening.
assumed that only Rachel would be home when the
door finally opened and were completely unaware
that both Rachel and her father were at the door. Turned
around and bent over, the boys laughed heartily
when they heard the young girl gasp oh my
god at the sight of their bare behinds. But
they quickly realized their mistake when they
heard a second voice, a male voice, suddenly boom
out WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON??
the porch while simultaneously trying to re-buckle
their pants, boys might have been a bit too
distracted to hear the reverends final
comment to them as they ran off his property.
that is not what I was talking about last week at
church when I said that we all need to turn the