Let Them Eat
Steak
by Aaron Troye-White
“Darla!
He said he was just being sarcastic! Just giving
a finger to the liberal media.” Clint
clapped his hands once and guffawed. “Trump
got the fake news good.”
“So, what
am I doing with all this bleach?”
“Bring it
to the rally. Trump said it works outside the
body.” Clint looked over to his daughter
shading in the letters on the poster-board.
“Sign's looking great! 'My body, my choice.'
That's just perfect. Government ain't gonna tell
us what to do. Time to get back to work.”
Clint was sick
of it. Sick of the pandemic. Sick of the masks.
Sick of people demanding free money. Sick of
China stealing their jobs, giving us disease in
return. People need to put in hard day's work. No
more handouts. He didn't give up when he flunked
high school, he found a job at the glue factory.
He didn't become a cuck when Obama closed the
factory down, he started educating himself on all
the injustice towards rural, blue collar, REAL
MEN like himself, and did his best to educate the
world through the comments sections, using all
capitalized letters so everyone could read it
clearly. He collected welfare, sure, but it was
his due because he'd diligently paid his taxes
for the full five years he was employed, unlike
those illegal Mexicans, getting checks for twice
as much and mailing it across the border to the
cartels.
“Dinner
smells terrible.”
“Clint, I
already told you, Walmart was out of meat.”
“How many
times do I gotta tell you? We got meat.”
“We ain't
doing it.”
“The 'rona
gonna get her anyway.” Clint walked over to
his mother-in-law and started waving his arms.
“Myrtle! You don't care if we eat you, do
you?”
The old woman
just stared forward through her coke-bottle
lenses as Fox News blared. Her face just screamed,
“kill me now.”
Clint plopped
back down, not before grabbing his can of
Keystone from the table. “She ain't said a
word since autumn 2016. She just wasting away.
Every day we don't eat her, she losing good meat.
Three weeks, no bacon, she'll be just skin and
bones.”
Easy for you
to say. Your mom died when you were a kid.”
“Yeah,
and only I shed one tear, and dad whooped me for
it. No use being sentimental. Our daughter's not
gonna starve to death. We'll eat grandma's ass
first!”
“Well,
she did vote Obama.”
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