Winstons first tour
en lair and volte-face happened when he
walked into a huge spiders web on his way
back from the pub. His mates and passersby
whistled and cheered. It was a pivotal moment for
Winston, who bowed deeply and then performed a
dazzling encore. Hooked on fame, he enrolled in
dance classes, and soon was ready to astound the
His best friend Roland
suggested a career in politics. Its
like dancing, he explained, except
theres no music and no choreography, you
just go forwards and backwards, sidestep a lot,
change partners at will and take a swipe at
whoever gets in your way.
Winston stood for nothing
and was voted into parliament by people who fall
His career advanced in
leaps and bounds. He danced as if no one were
watching. Except they were.
When he tried to combine
limbo with moonwalking, Winston was caught with
his pants down, and his career reached a new low.
Hounded by media, he dived
for cover, but his demons seized him, and Winstons
final political act was a danse macabre akin to
St Vitus dance with rapid, jerky movements,
grimacing, and frothing at the mouth.