travel had to be unforgettable. Eve drove travel
agents crazy, and all for nothing. I was
beginning to tire of our endless quest for the
really matter where we go? I said while
driving to the umpteenth travel agency. Well
have each other, who cares about the rest. A nice
view, good food, fine weather -- thats all
we need. We could go anywhere.
pregnant pause, Eve dropped each word like a
miniature atomic bomb, Of course, it
And then we
met Mr Fred Mayhem from the Travel of Your Life
Fred, he said, smiling from here to the
eternity and shaking our hands with well
practiced genuine enthusiasm.
crisp shirt and stylish tie, I imagined him after
a mind squeezing session with Eve: noble forehead,
sparkling with sweat; million dollar smile,
drooping from exhaustion; compassionate eyes,
dulled by a curtain of despair.
But Mr Mayhem
proved to be tougher than other representatives
of the travel agents race. Perhaps it was his
name that hardened him against hardships. Anybody
else would have changed Mr Mayhem to Mr Sweet or
Mr Goodman in no time, but not this guy. Watching
his duel with Eve, I hoped she finally met her
Fred stroke a decisive blow at Eves
imagination with Cosmic Honeymoon.
minute, I said. Are you sure its
safe? I dont want to take risks, you know.
percent safe. And absolutely unforgettable. You
cant go wrong with it.
a Russian saying: he who doesnt risk, doesnt
drink champagne, Eve said, shooting at me a
meaningful glance, charged with contempt. I
want Cosmic Honeymoon.
know about you, but when people tell me something
is one-hundred percent safe and
cant go wrong, I start worrying.
Even before I could read, I discovered a
fundamental law of nature: anything can go wrong,
and it usually does.
share Eves enthusiasm about Cosmic
Honeymoon. Thirty days locked in a cabin of
your dreams, orbiting Mother Earth -- sure,
its exciting, unforgettable and all that,
but wouldnt a day or two be enough? Wouldnt
you start feeling like a squirrel running in its
wheel after a week of this cosmic paradise? And
what about all this honeymoon business -- how do
you do it without gravity? This aspect wasnt
covered in colorful advertising prospects.
not, when at the flight preparation course they
stuffed me into a centrifuge and sent me spinning
to hell, I thought Id vomit my heart out.
do this, I told Eve after they dragged me
out and reanimated what was left of me.
she replied. Im not giving up on my
Cosmic Honeymoon, no matter what. Right, Freddy,
dear? Eve fixed on Mr Mayhem the same
hypnotic gaze she used to reserve for me.
That solved it.
Now shes Mrs Mayhem, spinning on the orbit.
I hope Mr Mayhem can figure out how to do it