Amazon Employee
To Be
Or
maybe not while in phone loop hell
by Rick Tornello
“All
agents are assisting other candidates,we will be
with you ASAP, All agents are assisting
other candidates, we will be with you ASAP,All
agents are assisting other candidates, we will be
with you ASAP,All agents are assisting other
candidates, we will be with you ASAP………..”
That’s where I am in right now
While I fill out the form
No resume required
Drug test yes pass, but of course!
Two weeks later this email
Instructed:
Fill this out then sign electronically so simple
so clean, but there’s a catch.
“All agents are assisting other candidates,we
will be with you ASAP, All agents are
assisting other candidates, we will be with you
ASAP,All agents are assisting other candidates,
we will be with you ASAP,All agents are assisting
other candidates, we will be with you ASAP………..”
BUT what ho what have we here?
As I read the small print the recorded voice
continues unabated:
“All agents are assisting other candidates,we
will be with you ASAP, All agents are
assisting other candidates, we will be with you
ASAP,All agents are assisting other candidates,
we will be with you ASAP,All agents are assisting
other candidates, we will be with you ASAP………..”
Reading the pre-employment agreement
If you do anything, say or write anything
Work for a competitor
You’re up the creek,
Or in court or whatever.
Just like Disney and Harley Davidson,
Don’t piss the giants off!
“All agents are assisting other candidates,we
will be with you ASAP, All agents are
assisting other candidates, we will be with you
ASAP,All agents are assisting other candidates,
we will be with you ASAP,All agents are assisting
other candidates, we will be with you ASAP………..”
So,
I emailed to the indicated spot
to go over the agreement and get help.
1st level couldn’t help, of course not, it's
not in their script.
Passed me on to 2nd level, same as before just
whole lot more.
Couldn’t help sent me to yet another up the
chain
And was put on hold, because he was not allowed
to put a person on hold for a few minutes
5 minutes or more later?
“All agents are assisting other candidates,we
will be with you ASAP, All agents are
assisting other candidates, we will be with you
ASAP,All agents are assisting other candidates,
we will be with you ASAP,All agents are assisting
other candidates, we will be with you ASAP,All
agents …
I guess the machine is the first level of Phone-loop
hell.
Where's Dante?
And there I sat and all the while, wrote this
story poem, which if I signed the agreement, I
would be in violation and they would own this too!!.
How nice. How prime!
Yep!
“All agents are assisting other candidates,we
will be with you ASAP, All agents are
assisting other candidates, we will be with you
ASAP,All agents are assisting other candidates,
we will be with you ASAP,All agents are assisting
other candidates, we will be with you ASAP………..”
Control-alt-delete, exit,
“All agents are assisting other candidates,we
will be with you ASAP, All agents are
assisting other candidates, we will be with you
ASAP,All agents are assisting other candidates,
we will be with you ASAP,All agents are assisting
other candidates, we will be with you ASAP………..”
NO END
By
RdotTornello & The
Village idiot Press
© 11/3 through the 8th/2018
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