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Style Sheet For Today
by Doug Hawley

Community – Add after any group
Wrong – Brown haired
Wrong - Scientists
Right – Brown haired community
Right – Scientific community

Commas – separate items in a list, but not clauses

Clauses – There are none – college educated people don’t understand them.

Conjunctions – Use at the beginning of a sentence

Wrong – He was at home, but he went to town.
Right – He was at home.  But he went to town.

Impact – Use wherever educated people would use affect or effect.  Use everywhere.

Wrong – The injury had effects had affected him.
Right – Impact impact impact impact impact.

Gender – There are none.  Put an x after titles or group names.  No him, her, he, she, hers, his it is now them, they theirs.

Wrong – Panda
Wrong – Ms.
Wrong – Him
Right - Pandax
Right – Mx (Not to be confused with the missile.  Ignore spell check redlining Mx)
Right – They

Ethnic designation – Person of color, even though no one knows exactly to whom it applies (are Janpanese or Iranians poc, who knows?)

Wrong – Colored person despite its similarity to person of color
Wrong -  Non-white
Wrong – Anything other than person of color

Reported or alleged – Never use.  Use reportedly or allegedly, adverbs that might apply to something, but probably not.

Wrong – He was reported to have stolen a safe.
Right – He reportedly stole a safe.

Hopefully – Always use without specifying who is hoping.  Never use hoped.

Wrong – He hoped she would win.
Right – Hopefully she would win.

Issue – Use in place of problem, error, mistake.  Those words should never be used.

Wrong – He died of cancer.
Right – He died from a health issue.

Clichés – Use one until it has been used ten million times, for ten years or until it becomes popular again.

Wrong – I have decided that I am interested in Jen.
Wrong - Bad appearance
Right – I walked back Jen not being on my radar.
Right - Bad optics

Grammar rules or spelling don’t apply anywhere unless you want certain jobs, so write as though you were texting in any other situation.

Wrong birthday card – Happy birthday on your 80th Grandmother
Right birthday card – Grammar, happy bday ur 80, lol

Nouns and verbs – Change nouns to verbs and verbs to nouns

Wrong – He spends his weekdays requesting donations from businesses, and he hopes that they will send him big donations.
Right – He weekdays sending big asks to the business community.  And hopefully they will gift him big donations.

The author is a little old curmudgeon who has been labelled a "language bigot" and worse. Don't worry, his kind will die out soon, lol.