Smart Car
by Doug Hawley
23: Easter
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Sheila had studied religion
in college and while not adhering to any
traditional religion, was fascinated by the
interplay between human culture and religion. She
felt, but rarely mentioned aloud, that she
believed that God was created in our image,
rather than the other way around. She
decided to hold a forum on Easter about Easter.
To start off, she asked husband Duke, and the
cars Deuce, Josie, and Carl what they knew about
Easter. She was surprised that Deuce
answered, because his knowledge was spottier than
the other two cars.
“Easter celebrates something which is either
a myth or a real event depending on who you ask. Either
Christ truly arose from a crypt after death, or
it is a myth about an event that didn’t
happen. I believe the latter for
several reasons. Dead people are not
brought back to life, reports written many years
later about the resurrection are not credible and
it could be based on earlier resurrection stories
such as the well-known Isis and Osiris of Egypt. The
celebration in spring suggests that it copies
many other resurrection stories based on seasonal
changes such that of Baal which seems to based on
the weather.”
An amazed Duke exclaimed “Wow, Deuce, I had
no idea you knew so much. No offense.”
Deuce replied “I know that my knowledge is
limited, but the guy who installed my brain was a
religious fanatic and I followed his interest. I’ve
written books on the subject. I’m
skeptical about the deity of Jesus but admire his
lessons. Several cultures have stories
about heroes who never die but will return to
save a nation when needed. One example
is King Arthur in England.”
Duke broke in “You know that some of the
traditions are totally bonkers? The
Easter egg thing was based on the idea that
rabbits were birds. I looked that up,
maybe it was in Wikipedia. The eggs
hatching represent resurrection.”
Duke got a lot wrong, so Sheila said, “I’ll
have to check on that.”
Duke agreed that it was a good idea.
Sheila took back the forum. “The
lesson of Christianity, Islam and Zoroastrianism
is that humans can also be resurrected and return
to some form of life. What do you
think of that?”
Josie asked “Zoroastrianism?”
“It is the religion that preceded Islam from
the area that is now Iran. It
influenced Judaism during the Babylonian
captivity. The Biblical Magi were
Zoroastrians. In answer to Sheila’s
question, I’m continuously resurrected by
new parts and software.” Deuce’s
response caused three blank looks.
Josie returned to resurrection. “I’m
not a theological star like Deuce, but I’d
prefer reincarnation rather than resurrection. I’d
like to come back as a convertible with a big
battery.”
Carl pointed out “But Josie, I love you just
the way that you are”, causing Josie to purr
sensuously.
Duke agreed “I’m like Carl, in life or
death; I want to share it with my honey, Sheila. Because
we know that matter is neither created nor
destroyed, we will all continue to exist in some
form. Maybe my body will be radish
feed.”
A pleased Sheila finished with “I tried to
start an Easter discussion, but it ended up more
like Valentine’s Day, and I’m not
complaining. Now let’s find those
eggs.”
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