The Cat Burglar
by Jerry Guarino
Alex was suave and polished,
the type of man women long for. Prepped and
pampered since he was a child, he grew up in a
fine New England home to parents of distinction.
He attended the finest private schools and
vacationed in Europe. His hobbies were magic and
tennis, in fact he was professionally acclaimed
at both of them. Alex was just about perfect for
any refined woman looking for a mate, except for
one fact. Alex was a thief.
You may remember the David
Niven character from The Pink Panther
movies. Alex was a cross between him and James
Bond. Not only did he steal from the rich, but he
bedded beautiful women along the way, all while
avoiding capture by various law enforcement
groups. He traveled the world stealing from the
elite and super rich, in Europe, Asia and the U.S.
He became a minor celebrity, playing as an
amateur in tennis tournaments and entertaining
the wealthy with magic shows at posh parties.
Alex seemed to have everything.
Often, he would sneak out
of these parties to look for fine jewelry and
other expensive items, only to return innocently
to the festivities. He used his skills as a
magician to appear and disappear at will and his
sleight of hand to palm valuables from
unsuspecting men and women. He never got caught.
He was never even suspected, proven by the fact
that he was invited back to the rich and famous
Alex had a criminal rival,
about the only person who knew what Alex was
doing. Her name was Sorana, a dark-haired beauty
of Italian descent. Alex and Sorana seemed to run
into each other at these wealthy homes. One night,
Alex and Sorana slipped away from the party to
make love in an upstairs bedroom. Alex tried to
take a necklace as they were getting dressed when
Sorana caught him. It was either confess or be
turned in to the owners. Sorana told Alex that
she was also a thief, that she stole from the
wealthy around the world too. They made a mutual
pact, not to turn the other one in. Whenever
their paths crossed in Paris or Belgium or Palm
Beach, they would always make time for some
romance during the party.
It was at one of those
parties that Alex asked for a volunteer from the
gathering for a trick, the familiar make someone
disappear act. Naturally, he chose Sorana and
while the crowd applauded with laughter and
admiration, Sorana was upstairs stealing jewelry.
When she returned, after discreetly hiding her
stolen loot, Alex slipped away to break into one
of the owners computers and take financial
Alex and Sorana seemed like
a pair that movies are made about. The beautiful
jet set couple traveled the world, making love
and stealing from the wealthy. If they werent
criminals, you would even admire them.
Little did Alex know, but
Sorana was a secret agent for Interpol, splitting
her time on both sides of the law. She gathered
evidence against Alex, all while stealing at the
One night in an upper
Manhattan soiree, Alex seduced the wife of a
billionaire banker, even slipping out to make
love with her during the party. Feeling scorned
by her partner in bed and crime, Sorana decided
to end this arrangement. A week later, police
planned to raid his home in Greenwich.
The police surrounded his
home around midnight. Officers with machine guns,
dressed in protective gear, announced their
presence and then opened the heavy front door
with a battering ram. They threw a flash-bang
grenade inside, then rushed through the rooms,
laser sighted red lights pointing the way. They
found Alex in bed, cowering with fear.
I give up he
said. Dont shoot me.
Wheres the loot,
Alex? We know you have everything stashed here
because none of it has been recovered.
In the room in the
back of the house. Alex was crestfallen,
his reign of crime now over. They led him out in
handcuffs and put him in the police van.
The detectives went to the
back of the house, and prepared to see a room
full of treasure. They opened the door, flipped
on the lights and were immediately attacked by a
Cat Burglar by Jerry Guarino
Copyright March, 2019 All Rights Reserved