At the Elventh
by David Harker
Come on Phil!
Itll be great fun Youll really
Jan had been trying for a
week now to persuade him that tonights
office fancy dress party would be fun. Never the
most outgoing of folks, Phil had finally agreed
OK! OK! You win!
Well go! he smiled indulgently.
Whats the theme
anyway? Please tell me its not Tarts and
Vicars, or even worse Rocky Horror Picture Show?
Wearing stockings with legs like these is bloody
agony. Nylons and these leg hairs together can
generate enough static to power a small city!
Jan giggled mischievously
and smothered him in a huge hug.
Oooo thank you!
Youre quite safe Joe is a big Lord
of the Rings fan and I heard from Sally that she
was sure the costumes had to be themed on
With that small victory,
she ran to the wardrobe and produced two large
brown cardboard boxes and dropped them on the bed.
Opening the larger of the two, she
enthusiastically stripped to her underwear. Phil
laughed and raised an appreciative eyebrow.
certainly one benefit
now wheres my
In there Phil,
youll look just gorgeous smiled Jan
as she pushed the smaller box Phils way.
Come on you, get your
kit off or were going to be late!
An hour later, with Phil
pulling uncomfortably at the gusset of his green
tights, a beautiful Elven maiden and her slightly
plump and misshapen Elf warrior climbed into the
car and set off.
I dont care
what happens Jan, if we get stopped by the police
I promise you Im doing a runner!
Jan just burst out laughing.
You? Running through
Frankwell dressed like that? I think youd
be safer in police hands!
Phil smiled self-consciously
as they arrived at the hotel and walked through
reception to the hotel function room. As he
stepped through the door, it took him just a
moment to realise something wasnt right.
Maybe it was the abundance of white rhinestone
jump suits? Or maybe it was the sideburns and
Oh crap! Its
its bloody ELVIS!