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by Rebecca Burke

A friendly greeter in the entrance smiles at me as I walk in
'If there’s anything I can help...' yet you cant hear amongst the din
Men past their prime buy lotto tickets and The Sun
Though they'd squander the cash on football tickets even if they won

Mothers with sunken faces wearily eye fashion mags
Wondering wearily if Demi Moore gets under-eye bags
Children that already get everything and more
Demanding to know why they don’t own everything in the store

Mysterious plastic doors lead to vast loading spaces
Trolleys fly through these launching a frenzied assault at our faces
Zitty youths at pizza counters (well you are what you eat)
Act like Italian chefs cramming Edam onto dough - wow some feat!

Shoppers that clearly never socialise anyplace else hold up the aisle
Who think we all wish to hear them spouting their small-talk bile
Moody dieting women buying salad and catching sight of their rear
While husbands fold arms over pot bellies look smug and buying beer

Trying to rifle through the reduced for quick sale fashions
Being blocked full on by 70 year olds buying g-strings with a passion
Not knowing where the adults section ends and kids begin
Then realising that pair of hot pants would never skim your large rim

Kids fashions are great why do they get to be all funky and glam?
Yet long sweaters and suit jackets make us resemble a side of ham
Trying and failing to load your shopping on the conveyer swiftly
Having your purchases eyed behind you by a bearded man of fifty

Shamefully regarding your ready meals for one and sanitary ware
and celeb mag to aspire to plus leave-in treatment for dry split hair
They say supermarkets are the ideal places to pull
I feel like my eyes are being covered with vast amounts of wool

To be seen at your worst bending ungraciously over a trolley
Not knowing which section to find cup a soups and feeling a wally
Having your every item of food inspected - your life is on show
Are you gonna meet your Prince Charming ?- The answer is No!