by M. Allman
I sat on the
crinkly paper listening to a doctor diagnose me
with ED. Yep, erectile dysfunction. I
listened as he explained what it is, and why I
shouldnt be embarrassed or feel like any
less of a man.
After a brief
moment to soak it all in, I had to ask. Whats
the treatment? A pill?
Doc shook his
head. I dont think taking a pill is
the answer. You seem to be in good health, so Id
like you to try an experimental treatment.
up for experimental I guess.
your problem is up here." He pointed at his
head. And not down here, he said
gesturing to the groin area. So, my
treatment, as crazy as it sounds, is to try
something out of the ordinary. Go home, slip into
your wifes lingerie, and let loose and have
fun, he said wiggling his brows.
kidding right? I slid off the table to grab
my pants to get out of there.
it. If it doesnt work, come back and well
talk about medications.
I left feeling
worse than when I went in. What kind of man wears
his wifes undies? I mumbled as I walked
into the house.
My wife stood
there with a questioning stare.
I sat on the
couch, she sat down beside me.
just want to know how your doctor visit went.
What did he say?
She held my
hand firmly as if I were terminal.
I think hes a quack. He told me to wear
back clapping his hands squealing with laughter.
it. Im going in the other room.
She grabbed my
arm as I started to stomp away. Her large, brown
eyes still twinkled with laughter. Lets
try it. She started to snicker and quickly
covered her mouth. It might be fun to get a
I jerked my
arm away. You cant be serious?
am. She stared up at me, trying to contain
I made my way
to the bedroom. Was I the only sane person left
on the earth? I fell back on the bed, staring at
the ceiling. Picturing my large, hairy physique
in a bra and panties was sort of funny. I felt
bad for being mean and childish, and really what
did I have to lose?
I squeezed a
pair of pink lace panties and matching bra onto
my large body. I danced into the living room,
twirling like a ballerina. My wife looked up and
squealed with laughter.
She sprang up
off the couch and danced with me, leading us both
to the bedroom. We fell together, landing side by
side on the bed. Kissing and hugging, while we
My wife rolled
over on top of me and smiled. I think the
treatment is working. She winked.