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THE DR. PHILBILLY SHOW - Flipper - The Toe
by Wayne Carlan

Several weeks back we were in church on a beautiful Sunday morning. On that particular day we had a guest preacher and it was getting toward the end of the service. The preacher had given an excellent sermon on the power of prayer and healing. Now it’s normally our two sons that we have to get on to during service to stop aggravating each other but today it was my wife.

Melissa kept flicking something on her key chain and making this noise in my ear that was driving me nuts. I ignored it as long as I possibly could then I finally (and ever so politely) asked her to stop, which only resulted in her intensifying her efforts to drive me completely insane. I should have known better than to say anything. What was I thinking?

So I started to aggravate her back but nothing was working. The preacher was now asking us to bow our heads in prayer and that’s when I saw something that just cracked me up. I couldn’t stop laughing! Melissa whispered in my ear wondering what in the heck was so funny.

I said “It’s your little toe.” (Melissa was wearing sandals)

She said “What about it?”

I then proceeded to tell her that from my angle her little toe looked like the head of a dolphin. So when the prayer was concluded I started calling her “Flipper” and talking to her in dolphin language. You know…the high pitch squeaking noise.

She got so mad that she punched me in the dang ear. Right in the middle of church! We were in the process of standing up for the end of the service when it happened and it knocked my equilibrium off. I lost my balance and started staggering out into the middle of the aisle. At the same time the preacher asked if anyone needed prayer and when he spotted me, he held out his arms in my direction inviting me forward.

Everybody was just staring at me so I had no choice but to walk up front. I was committed. My mother in law was so proud. When I got to the front he asked me what I needed and I just told him I had an earache and he prayed for me. I also asked him if he could say a little prayer for my wife because I had a feeling the rest of her day was going to be a little rough. I’m just sayin’.