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Delays At Centrals
by Michael S. Collins

Unexpectedly, last Thursday
A bomb went off in Central
Thirty dead, we’d never seen
Anything like it.
It even got a few
Minutes in the national news.
Complaints were made and
Heard instantly.
“My train was cancelled! Oh, the horror!”
Yelled Mr Crisp of Rutherglen,
Who, knowing friends in higher places
Won a knighthood for his moan.
He knew some bankers you see.
“Holidays ruined! This cannae do!”
Cried Mrs Moan of Argyll Street
“We paid well for these seats
And B’n’B in Campbelltown.
Now we’ve missed our connecting
Train, and all for a few dead Scots!”
Questions were raised
In Parliament, about how best
To punish the railway, the station,
The Scots and the dead,
For having hurt the travel,
The confidence and the stocks
The First Minister was
Unavailable for comment.