Rich Have Their
Free Ride Revoked
by Roger Freed
A new law has
been passed in Congress by which all wealthy
individuals who keep their finances in tax-free
havens outside the U.S. cannot receive local tax
based social services. Rich individuals who have
their cash in places such as Switzerland, Bermuda,
Cayman Islands, Barbados and other off shore
banking paradises will not be protected by police,
fire departments, libraries, road maintenance,
water and sewer, and other amenities.
The effects of
this law has taken an interesting toll on the tax
evaders. Millionaire Tex Rideum, CEO of Patsy
Investment Firm, was denied fire truck service
when he reported a blaze at his home. Mr. Rideum
is now living in the basement of what was once
his $3 million mansion.
Bartha Steward,
TV show hostess of 'Pretentious Pretties' and
head of a multi-million dollar home beautifying
business was denied police help when she called
in a burglary at her home at the exclusive gated
community of Ostentatious Oasis. Ms. Steward had
to appear before the cameras for a week with a
black eye and arm in a cast as a result of her
melee with the robbers.
The family of
Reginald P. Whiteguy III is having to use the
woods for their ' bodily evacuations' after
having the sewer lines tuned off on their
Connecticut mansion. The odor from backup is
causing them to have to live on the non-leeward
side of the house and to keep the windows closed
even in sweltering weather.
J. Gatesbee,
billionaire extraordinaire of the real estate
firm Landgrab, was shocked to have his drivers
license taken away by State Troopers while out on
a cruise. He was forced to abandon his
Lamborghini and humiliatingly walk back to his
home in the Berkshires. “This is a crock!”
he stated to reporters later, Why should I have
to pay for roads that peasants use too?”
Shahashi
Boudrahi, a software CEO originally from India,
was denied entry at Kennedy Airport and had his
US Passport taken away. “This is terrible!”
he told radio station KRUD “How will I ever
be able to get anything done from my home town of
Kalihasbar? They don't even have electricity
there and no Starbucks!”
Mr. And Mrs.
Anthony Trustfrump found their marriage was
annulled. Their State marriage license was
revoked and they were informed by the Boston
State's Attorney that she would be considered a
prostitute and he her client until the matter was
resolved.
Most
disturbing of all was the death of Mrs Joyce
Brickbottom, wife of airline chief Race
Brickbottom at their home in Lexington, Virginia.
The local Coroner refused to pick up or examine
the body, so the family was forced to move their
deer meat out of the large freezer that they had
and put her in it. Local detectives say that it
is an unfortunate act of human nature, but that
everybody has to go sometime. They did offer
their condolences to the family and sent them a
sympathy card at state expense.
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