The Short Humour Site

Home : Writers' Showcase : Submission Guidelines : A Man of a Few More Words : Links

Writers' Showcase

Modern Day Superhero
by Christopher Silva

It'd been another hard day, I was shattered. I rescued a treed cat, stopped a plane from crashing and lifted an electric pole off a car; saving the three children in the backseat. Yeah, a hard day indeed.

The life of a super hero is not an easy one, with modern litigation and lawsuits flying around more than I do.

Once, I had a fortune. Mostly gifts from rescued victims and such. Now, I was living in a two room on the lower east side and could barely make rent.

The first lawsuit was painful and I'll never forget it. I pulled a small luxury yacht out of a raging hurricane just off the Keys. Basically, saving the passengers. The yacht was slightly damaged in the process but what the hell; the folks walked away, right! But NOOO, that just wasn't good enough for ole Miss Steinmann. She convinced her lawyer, the jury and the judge that they would have made it out of the storm just fine. And that I was to blame for the damage done to her three million dollar boat.

I didn't even have representation then. Oh, how naive I was. I walked in and expected them to thank me for being so great and helpful. Certainly, another key to the city was warranted. What I got instead was slapped with an injunction, and had to pay for the repairs and due stress caused to the Steinman's and their passengers. Which, I must say, did not get involved. Oh, that hurt, it really hurt.

I still do it though. I get up every morning and try my damnedest to help someone. Many of my closest friends say. "Harald", that's my name by the way, "why the hell do you do it?" "You're a Super Hero, you could do anything you want". "Why don't you just walk into a bank and take what you need and fly off to some place and live happily ever after?" The answer is so simple; I am, and always will be a Super Hero, and have sworn to and uphold the code.

So here I am, rubbing myself down with Ben-Gay and stitching my costume. I'll get to bed early and wake at dawn with one task in mind. Helping the human race.

I am a bit more careful nowadays and keep my acts of goodness focused on large disasters, ones that my lawyer approves of of course.

Yes, I keep a mobile next to my heart with my lawyers number on the speed dial, for I am the modern day super hero.