The Prince of
Polka – Prom Night
by Don Drewniak
Lester
Schwartz, my boss at H. Schwartz and Sons Lumber
and Hardware, owned a 1959 white DeSoto
convertible with a black top. Several nights
before the prom, I jokingly asked him if I could
borrow the DeSoto for the prom.
“Only if
I get to take your hot rod home.”
“Are you
serious?”
“Yes.”
I was stunned
and, to be honest, somewhat nervous. Having an
accident would have been the disaster to end all
disasters. However, the offer was too
irresistible to turn down. Normally, I worked
from 2:30PM to 9:00PM on Fridays during the
school year. However, the boss and I swapped keys
at five o’clock and I cautiously drove home
with the DeSoto to get ready for the big night.
It was a double date with my lomg-time friend
Lenny and his date, Christina (Tall Girl). The
prom was held at the National Guard Armory on
Dwelly Street adjacent to Cook Pond in Fall River.
Thankfully, no
one mentioned the previous night’s polka
debacle. Helena and I stayed off the dance floor.
The prom ended at ten o’clock. The reason
for the early exit was that it was followed by a
late dinner at a Sheraton Hotel in Providence.
Off we went. The evening was warm enough to have
the convertible top down, but the girls
understandably did not want to have their hairdos
messed by the wind.
Arriving at
the Sheraton, I found a parking space alongside a
park, and diagonally across the street from the
hotel. I got out of the car, walked around the
back of the DeSoto, opened the passenger door and
extended my left hand to assist Helena out of the
car. As she stepped onto a sidewalk, there was a
loud ripping sound. The left side of her gown
caught on the door handle resulting in a foot-long
rip. She burst into tears. I was at a total loss
as to what to do or say.
As soon
Christina exited the car, she immediately tried
to console Helena. Lenny, on the other hand,
looked at the rip and broke into laughter.
“We can
fix it,” said Christina.
Fat chance.
I offered to
take Helena home. After a protracted discussion
between the two girls, they decided they would
try to somehow conceal the rip. As soon as we
entered the Sheraton, they headed for a ladies’
room. Christina came out by herself three or four
minutes later and spoke with several other girls.
They all went into the ladies’ room. After
what seemed to be an hour, but in reality was
only a matter of minutes, they all came out.
Helena’s left arm was pressed tightly
against her gown. It didn’t help matters
much, but I did have enough presence of mind to
sit to her left during the dinner.
Neither one of
us said a word to the other during the meal, nor
did we speak during the drive back to Fall River.
First stop was her house. Before I had time to
reach for the door handle to let myself out,
Helena opened the passenger door, stepped out and
made a beeline for the front door of her house. I
drove away.
Next stop was
Christina’s house. At least Lenny got a good-night
kiss at her doorstep.
When he
reentered the car, he said, “Nice going. You
really screwed up our chances.”
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