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Food For Thought
by Ian Curtress

I know she will be watching, thinking he doesn’t improve.
I’m dusting flour off my butchers apron, and various other surfaces having just made six lovely Rock cakes. Why does it fly everywhere! There’s a fortune to be made for the first Company to produce heavy flour.
I know I’m not as organised in the kitchen as my late lovely Wife but I’m sure there’s understanding and appreciation at the efforts I have made to maintain good cooking and a healthy diet.
But I digress. Back to my superb rock cakes. All the effort and moments of short temper are forgiven after the first bite. I’m sure they would take a first at the WI.
Too good to be called Rock cakes. What about Mounds of Ecstasy? Oh.Perhaps not. HONI SOIT QUI MAL Y PENSE'
I know it will spoil my lunch but a second is irresistible.
My new found skills have not been developed without sleepless nights and bouts of indigestion. At least I have proven top Chefs wrong on many an occasion when they say follow the recipe and you can’t go wrong. Want to bet!
Take my omelettes (if you’re not fussy) why do they singe on the bottom when top isn’t cooked. Have solved it by using the grill.
Where there's a Will there’s a whey as they say in Cheddar.
A recent recipe advised “separate yoke from the white” Why? Nature got it right, they were happy together. Two eggs later I found cleaning up was an unwanted and unnecessary chore. The cake was completely edible.
I did it my way.
They say the best way to learn is on the job. Read about the Eton mess.
That took me back to my early experiments. Empty plate having Eaten a Mess. I’m rambling again, must be my home made Muesli.
Thought if it’s good enough for Eton it’s good enough for…. Leave it there, he was a kind Head just a little unsteady on his feet on Mondays
I followed the recipe but didn’t look promising so dropped it on the kitchen floor. Got the Mess bit right.
The recipe available upon request, plain brown envelope. Marked University Challenge.

Made a quantum leap in kitchen. Invested in an air fryer!
Our oven is good but why on floor level. I can see why they say women should design kitchens.
I’m no spring chicken, more your ancient mariner and removing hot casseroles is a death defying exercise.
I feel I should lay cutlery on the floor and eat while I’m down there.
So in the interest of safety and the emergency services I am proud owner of a Ninja No not a new crossbreed. An Air Fryer.
The best purchase I have made since life insurance.
Cooks in half the time, less fat and at kitchen surface Height!
My chicken drumsticks beat a rhythm to melt the heart of any gourmet.
I’m sure she is smiling down on me and satisfied at the good grounding she gave. No Ready meals or Meals on wheels. A healthy balanced diet.

I love my kitchen as she did. I love my cooking as she did.
My happiest room in a lonely house.