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Daily Affirmations For Dogs
(Muttfulness Meditation)
by Ash Jurberg

1. Today is the day I will catch that tail.
2. I am a good boy. I am the best boy. There is no boy better than me.
3. I am in a safe place. I will not bark at the mirror. Even though that dog kind of looks like me.
4. I am conquering my desire to eat my own poo; I am defeating it steadily each day.
5. I will not rollover. I may sit though. And stay.
6. I accept my emotions. My tail will wag to express all of them.
7. I will give my genitals the care and the attention that they deserve.
8. I will go on a walk! I will go on a walk! I will go on a walk!
9. I control the leash. The leash does not control me.
10. I have the patience required to find the perfect place to poop.
11. I am grateful to have people in my life who let me lick their face. Especially if I fail affirmation four.
12. I can chase the ball forever. Try me.
13. I accept my desire to smell butts. And I am OK with it.
14. I will respect the humans desire not to have their leg humped.
15. I am superior to the cat. Despite what the cat thinks. Or how she behaves.
16. I forgive those who have harmed me in my past by removing my testicles. I have detached from the memory just as my balls were detached from me.
17. Creative energy surges through me and leads me to dig. A lot.
18. Many people look up to me and recognize my worth; I am admired. My belly is always rubbed.
19. I wake up today with strength in my heart. And immediately go back to sleep for ten hours.
20. I am a powerhouse; I am indestructible. Watch me run in front of a car!
21. Walk time????? Walk time!!!!!!