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Celebrity Charity Appeal
by William Kitcher

Hello. I’m another Hollywood movie star, and I’m here to ask you to look into your hearts and give as generously as you can to bring an end to popular disease of the week number fourteen. As you know, it’s an issue very dear to me, and I feel so sad when I see the suffering of insert racial-national-gender group here. Due to mention unverified research data here, I now understand how much pain they have to endure in their body parts somewhere near the stomach.
 
To see firsthand what these people are going through, I recently took a trip to generic Third World country. Well-meaning foreigners are already working there for already-famous international organization but their resources are already stretched to the limit, dealing with child issue number thirty-three and building insert physical structure here all around the world.
 
Along with mention two other Hollywood actors, I’ve formed an organization to combat disease number fourteen. We are the International Something Something Organization, and we’re determined to eradicate this disease before insert optimistic date here. Please call our toll-free number, 1 800 more numbers, or go to our website at www.internationalsomethingsomethingorganization.ca.com.org.
 
You can make a difference by agreeing to give each month only x dollars, or by donating mention one-time dollar figure amount not out of reach of the average person.
 
Whatever you decide, you’ll be helping mention racial-national-gender group again here live better lives.
 
Thank you for caring.
 
Single tear.